Words Matter – III

Does anyone remember Connie Chung? She was one of the first female TV news anchors and worked for essentially all broadcast networks and several cable channels at one time or another. She was quite good at her job, perhaps too good since she was terminated for her tenacious interview tactics. One thing I remember very clearly is that she was sometimes referred to as an “anchorette.” Do you remember that? If not, please don’t think the term has gone away over the past few decades. It has not. As proof, I recently saw an article entitled “Television Business News – Hot Anchorette Wars . . . .” There is a lot here that merits discussion, but I’ll stick to the topic at hand.

Less Than

Over the past twenty or so years I attended numerous high school dance competitions. The teams, made up almost exclusively of female students, had names including Champettes, Tigerettes and Spiralettes, silly names using the suffix “ette,” the diminutive form of the whole. Just as we unconsciously refer to female babies as “little” girls, it generally goes unnoticed that girls’ sports teams are considered “less than” from day one. You may say this is not important precisely because it goes unnoticed, but I disagree. It is the very insidious nature of some words that makes them detrimental.

Think of the multitude of words that are altered to indicate “less than,” such as kitchenette, dinette, towelette and the meaning is clear, they are not the whole, not the real deal. When applied to a person, usherette, bachelorette, suffragette, why would that person not believe they are inferior to the original.

As petty as it may sound, I stated in an earlier post (Words Matter – I) there are words I do not like. It has taken nearly a lifetime for me to fully understand why. Here is a list of some of my least favorite words and terms and short explanations of why.

Problematic	Usage	Comment
“Girls” for women of all ages	Substitute for “women”	Woman is not a dirty word!
Lady	Substitute for “woman”	See above!
Maid/Matron of Honor	Wedding attendant	No male attendant equivalent
Maiden name	Name before marriage	I use “birth name”; in time may not be an issue
Miss/Mrs.	Marital status	Mr. for all men regardless of marital status
Whore/slut/bimbo/ho	Sexual promiscuity	Why not male equivalents?

I believe that some words, disguised as harmless, are actually demeaning. Are there words you especially like or dislike? Words you would like to change? Please share your thoughts and opinions with us here in the comment section.

Theme photo by Pixabay

 

Words Matter – II

If a child is told often, from a very young age, that he or she is limited (slow or weak) in some way, do you think the child will become an adult who believes he or she can accomplish anything of which it dreams? Or, will the child become an adult who is restricted and unsure of their capabilities? I believe what a child hears over and over has a significant impact on what the child sees as its potential.

When I was a nursing student I remember hearing that nurses and other caregivers talked to male and female newborns differently.  I didn’t have enough time as a student to fully appreciate this truth. Later though, when I began to teach OB (obstetrics) to nursing students, I rotated classes into and out of labor and delivery, newborn nursery and postpartum care. During three years of observation I indeed saw that what I had heard was true. It began as soon as the child slipped from their mother’s body and into the cold, bright and noisy delivery room.

From Day One

When a boy was delivered there was congratulatory talk, often booming loudly and as the boy infant began to cry everyone talked about his strong lusty voice. As he was wrapped in a blue blanket there were predictions of his first touchdown, layup or hole-in-one, whatever might please the proud father. When genitalia appeared without the external apparatus it was likely to result in hushed “ahhhhhs” as a pink blanket was held out to swaddle a baby girl. The remark most often heard was regarding her appearance using words like beautiful, dainty, maybe even predictions of her being a little “heartbreaker.” The love and gratefulness for a healthy newborn was not unequal, one not valued more than the other, but the words used were different.

Without a doubt the newborn would be referred to as “big” or “little” not according to the actual measurement of weight and length, but according to gender. There were exceptions, to be sure, if the child was a great deal smaller or larger than average, but nearly always a boy was referred to as “big bouncing” baby. A girl, even when over eight or nine pounds, was a “sweet little” girl.

This trend continued in the nursery while the newborn was bathed and examined and then transported back and forth to the mother’s room for feeding and bonding over the next hours of hospitalization. If you doubt this, I challenge you to listen carefully as your friends and family members discuss the babies in their lives. Observe the words that are used when the infant is spoken to and sung to and handled. It may seem insignificant at the time since the baby does not yet understand words, but the truth we need to remember is that this is just the beginning of a persistent message. Day after day a child is reminded that she is the “weaker sex,” to use an outdated term, and unable to do or be anything in the world to which she aspires. This is not intentional, not sinister, not done out of unequal love, but these facts do not dilute the message. Words matter, especially when repeated through years of developing a sense of who we are and what we are capable of achieving in life.

Theme photo by Pixabay

Art by Pat Brooks

Words Matter – I

Newspaper & Portrait Photography

It may sound trite, but there are words I do not like.  It is not necessarily that they do not sound pleasant, although that may be part of it. And, have you noticed words do not sound the same to everyone? For instance, “coin” is one of those for me. When I say it one of my daughters chuckles quietly. I think I pronounce it normally, but obviously I do not say the simple four letter word correctly. My Mom had a similar problem with the word “oxygen,” however I find that more forgivable. But, I am getting sidetracked before I actually begin.

Depression

What I intended to discuss are words that either do not sound like what they mean or that have meanings with which I disagree. Let me start with depression, which sounds like a lower surface, a dip or swag. A road uncared for might have a depression. An old floor may be depressed in spots. This versatile word may be applied to the economy or even a weather pattern. You get it, but what if this word is used regarding another human? Many people immediately think of a person in a bad mood, sad probably and maybe even lazy. Too often the person suffering from depression is told to “snap out of it” or “get over” themselves. Even if not said in actual words that is likely the message they receive, whether intentional or not. I believe it may be time for a new word for this complex diagnosis which covers an entire spectrum of symptoms from mild and transient to suicide.

“Domestic” Violence?

Another word, or term rather, is not only inadequate, like depression, but is also inaccurate.  “Domestic violence” describes a range of situations from emotional and physical threats to injury or even murder. There is nothing “domestic” about “violence!” This terminology should never have been used to begin with and it serves an injustice to victims of violence, whether in the home or elsewhere. Recently, the term “Relationship Violence” is sometimes used in media reporting and I strongly support this more accurate terminology. Some prefer “intimate partner violence,” but in my opinion this comes up short. First, it obviously leaves out victims whose abuser is someone other than a partner. The abuser could be any relative or friend with whom one has a relationship. Statistics indicate one in three women will be the victim of intimate partner violence, but including other types of relationships would most certainly increase the statistic greatly and there is no reason to limit attention to a particular type of relationship or gender.

Pink & Purple

For many years October has been Breast Cancer Awareness Month and we have been encouraged to wear pink to bring attention to this illness which effects over 124 women per 100,000 population (1.3 men/100,000). Wear pink if you choose, it isn’t my favorite color and reminds me of

girl babies more than women, but I would suggest pink ribbons do little to combat this deadly disease which has touched most of us either directly or indirectly. More helpful is knowing the signs of breast cancer, performing self exams and having regular mammography.

Someone in all sincerity I’m sure, has designated today as Purple Thursday and we are asked to “Wear a little purple with our pink” today. I must admit purple is one of my favorite colors, but rather than looking for something special to wear today I am writing this post. I wish to bring attention to Relationship Violence and encourage each of you, regardless of gender, to take action against this devastating situation which, like cancer, effects so many. Relationship Violence may take various forms other than physical abuse, including emotional, sexual, financial or verbal mistreatment. The signs and symptoms can be reviewed Online, including such sites as this National Hotline: http://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/abuse-defined/

• Let’s be better informed.
• Let’s be brave enough to report, whether it is personal or is suspected in another.
• Let’s refuse to say, “domestic” violence from this day forward.

 

Theme photo and graphic by Pixabay

Hospital Heist

When we hear of a theft from a hospital most of us immediately think: “drugs.” We hear of employees who slip syringes and pills into their pockets for self consumption or for sale and know they do this at great risk of being caught and punished. Addiction is at powerful epidemic proportions in Kentucky at this time, so hearing a news report of a hospital theft is not shocking.

Once though, twelve years ago I read of a theft at a hospital in Owensboro, KY that was of more interest. In fact, so unique I clipped the article from The Courier-Journal and still have it today to share with you. Here are some of the facts, perhaps you can help me to understand what might have been the motive of this particular hospital heist. The theft took place on Christmas Eve, so perhaps the culprit just needed something to give her family members on Christmas morning? Or maybe the loot was going to be sold at a late night pawn shop to support a drug habit? It is sad to imagine this individual desperate enough to risk being caught by surveillance cameras watching her as she committed this crime.

Those electronic eyes did their jobs well and saw this person clearly as she lifted 50 artificial eyes from a lobby display case. And, the best part of all in this tale? The person arrested was Melissa Jane Wink.

I swear and here’s my proof: 

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Pediatric Horror Story

Nurses in Training

As mentioned on the “About” page of this blog, I taught nursing a long time ago. I began teaching in 1978 which was when nurses wore white uniforms, hose, shoes and cap. The cap was symbolic of the nursing school from which one graduated. Mine was modestly winged with a black stripe indicating I was an alum of The Kentucky Baptist School of Nursing.

Teaching men and women who aspired to become a nurse was both daunting and rewarding. When the students were brand new they learned mundane tasks in the lab such as proper hand washing and sterile technique. In the classroom they learned subjects like pharmacology and anatomy.

Clinical Rotation

The most challenging days were when the students were taken into the clinical area for real hands-on hospital experience. I went in before 6 a.m. to review charts and choose one or more patients for each student to care for from 7 until 11 o’clock.  They would bathe, treat and monitor the patient and document everything in the nurse’s notes and on various graphs and forms in the chart. Meanwhile, as their teacher, I was running from room to room to instruct, supervise and observe their performances.

Post Conference

Following the hectic morning of caring for patients we would meet together for post conference. During this time each student presented their case(s) for the day. One by one they would state their patient’s diagnosis, age and other demographics, medications administered, tests and lab results and treatments rendered. It was an important part of the clinical experience, because the students were able to demonstrate what they had learned and answer questions from the group. It was, also, a way for each student to learn information from 10-12 different cases.

I will never forget some of the things I learned here, especially during the years I taught Pediatrics, since it was not the field of nursing in which I was most experienced. During post conference, students might share good news about blood work indicating a child’s recovery from leukemia, the troubling account of a toddler intentionally burned by one of its parents, maybe assisting with a spinal tap or accompanying an infant for X-rays.

One hot summer day we were gathered in a conference room while I listened dutifully to each student and added or corrected information as they presented their cases. One student went into great detail describing her little boy’s injuries which consisted of many lacerations and a fracture of the lower left extremity requiring surgery. She explained how the child was brought in by ambulance from his home in the country. She was dismayed at how, though he was only 10 years old, his parents let him handle many farm chores. She explained while accompanying his father in the field, he had been savagely injured by a wild animal. She had everyone’s attention and was clearly becoming excited as she continued to talk about the attack.

I sat speechless, a rare condition for me, but I could not make myself interrupt her animated presentation. She went on and on until finally one of her classmates asked the question everyone wanted to know: “What kind of animal was it”?  To which she breathlessly responded it was, “A bush hog!” 

Bush Hog by Pixabay