THE Binder

Several years ago I worked for a Fortune 500 company that had a binder for everything. I must have caught “binderitis” during my eighteen years there. I have binders all over the house. About seventy are filled with family photos and mementos and they are stored everywhere, some visible, many hidden. I feel sorry for my family when I die because they are going to have to figure out what to do with all these scrapbooks. 

There are other binders for various purposes. I find it easy to organize records in binders with dividers and color coding. OKAY! Maybe I am sicker than I thought, so if you are laughing it is fine. I’m hooked on binders and not likely to give up my habit. 

There is one binder however that I know my family will appreciate one day. I have two daughters and when I die they will know where to start to plan my memorial and to settle my estate. They will unlock the secret place and pull out THE BINDER.

 

This particular one is over eight years old and has been revised several times as situations change. It had a smaller predecessor. Let me tell you what this binder contains in its seven sections. 

1. End of Life – Copies of the Power of Attorney, Living Will, Healthcare Surrogate and Will. The originals are in a lockbox for which they have the keys.  
2. Finance – Banking and Insurance account information including account/policy numbers and contact names and phone numbers. Inventory of lockboxes. Charts (containing photos) listing family heirlooms (and other valuables), their locations and their origin (from grandparents, etc.) 
3. Funeral and Burial – Information on cemetery plot, gravestone contract regarding adding dates, suggestions and wishes for memorial service and data necessary for an obituary. 
4. House and Property – Copy of Deed(s), photos showing locations of water shutoff valves and electrical circuitry. 
5. Medical Information that may be needed by Healthcare Surrogate
6. Historical Information as needed
7. Miscellaneous and Resources 

You may not be happy working with a binder. That’s okay. A box will do or a drawer. It is simply important for everything to be in one place. It does not have to be meticulously organized (although that’s nice). The important thing is that it is all together and that the person(s) who will settle your estate knows where it is and has any keys necessary. It is also critical that the contents of the box, drawer, or binder be discussed ahead of the time it is needed. I call that THE TALK. https://crookedcreek.live/2017/01/25/death-decisions/

 

“Expect the best and prepare for the worst.” Muhammad Ali Jinnah

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Death – Intro II

Introduction II

As we move forward discussing the topic of death and end of life decisions, in particular, I refer you back to this blog’s first page, HOME. At the bottom is a disclaimer and it is important that you review it at now, particularly this:

“The content of this blog is not intended as advice . . . . Information contained herein is not presented as medical, legal or clinical recommendation . . . .”

And, I would add:

1. It is extremely advisable to seek legal counsel from an attorney for estate/end of life planning.
2. Forms are available Online for your review (or printing), but I caution you to use either the US Government (https://www.usa.gov/federal-agencies/a) or (https://www.irs.gov/forms-pubs), your State Government (state laws differ) or the American Bar Association (http://www.americanbar.org/groups/real_  property_trust_estate/resources/estate_planning/living_wills_health_care_proxiesadvance_health_care_directives.html) Websites. Using these sites one can avoid ads and scams.

The kind of end of life decisions we will focus on are sometimes included during estate planning which deals with financial issues. Money management is not part of our discussion.

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Future Posts

In the next few posts we will discuss the following topics, some more in depth than others:

• Power of Attorney (POA)
• Living Wills
• Health Care Surrogate/Proxy
• Organ Donation
• DNR (do not resuscitate) orders

Other topics in the future will include: Funerals, Obituaries, Grief and Suicide.

In the last post I asked you to say the words: “When I die” and to acknowledge we are born terminal. Some of you responded with your thoughts and experiences and I appreciate your honesty and willingness to share. It is not surprising there are those who are not ready to talk about such personal feelings. Discussing death is difficult in varying degrees based upon our past experiences and other factors, e.g., religion, age, health status. It was reassuring some of you have already taken formal steps to inform others of your wishes at the time of your death.

Reader Feedback

Marybeth, while sharing that her parents were very organized in having preparations in place for death, also stated, “Perhaps it is the way a person dies (long illness, accident, suicide, etc. ) that shakes our world more than the actual act of death itself? ” This is a valid observation, because while losing a person one loves will always be painful, there are many variables which affect how we react and how we grieve.

Rita discussed the awe of her own conception which is the beginning of the brief interlude we have on this planet. We often hear “cradle to grave,” which sums it up.

Finally, Lula shared the preparation she has made for her own death having had that responsibility for deceased loved ones. Such experiences in dealing with the estates and last wishes of others certainly point out the value of thinking ahead and making the decisions we are about to discuss.

Thank you to each of you who shared.

With the next post we will begin discussing the person (proxy) who makes medical decisions for you when you are unable to express your wishes. That person may be designated in a Medical POA, a Living Will and/or Designation of Health Care Surrogate.

“Life cannot exist without death; neither can death exist with life.” Osho Rajnish

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Past Problems with the COMMENT Section

Some have expressed frustration with trying to comment on posts. I understand and I admit it isn’t easy to figure out and I’ve made some changes AND mistakes along the way. To comment on any post click the little bubble below and right on this page. If yours is the first comment that little black bubble will have a + sign on it. If others have already commented there will be a number in the bubble. Either way, all you have to do is click the bubble and a space will be provided on which to write.

Here is a screen shot from my phone that shows the illusive “bubble.”

Thanks again!